October 24, 2021,
I failed in recognizing what she was doing to me. So blinded by her beauty, her pain became mine to bear. It was hard but never felt burdensome; until I let her take away my light and replace it with fear, doubt, ANXIETY, and most of all loneliness. We met in a homeless shelter and I was captivated instantly. She looked so fragile and innocent. I just wanted to hold her and tell her everything would be ok if she let me help her. We got to know each other, taking walks together downtown where the shelter was located. I just wanted to love her and mostly I wanted her to love me back.
We moved out after a few months the shelter helped us find an apartment in our budget. We made it work. For two yrs. Made it through so many struggles with her depression. She got a matching tattoo that says 'Loyalty' and I asked her to be my wife. She always accused me of being unfaithful to her and she became very abusive and drinking daily made it even worse. Alcohol is the worst substance in my opinion when it is abused. She chose the alcohol over me. I'm living in my truck since September 30th. She stayed with me while we both were working steady and had plenty of income to live 'happily' at least I was happy but she really wasn't. We could have went back to the shelter together, but they test for alcohol every night with a breathalyzer. I knew she wouldn't be able to get it under control as did she. She left me October 18th for a very young man that she worked with. She hasn't responded to any of my Facebook requests or phone calls. She just completely ignores me. I guess it's because she feels somewhat guilty, but she chose to hurt me instead of taking another option like staying with a female companion, she moved in with another 'man'. I'm so broken.
